Tuesday, January 31, 2012

I have sooo many bad habits. . .


(Sorry for the language!)

Looks like I am weighing in at 225 lbs. Yeah, that was hard for me to type. I wear size 1X shirts and my pants are a size 18. This is getting rediculous. I haven't gained any weight in the past year, but just knowing that I have made NO PROGRESS is killing me. I was supposed to recommit to this diet thing on January 1st just like everyone else, BUUTTTT I procrastinated, yet again. See, this is where I run into my BIGGEST problem. I procrastinate. I quit. I GIVE UP. Sometimes I even give up without even realizing until I'm sitting in the bed eating shit like cinnamin buns or chips. Sometimes both. UGH! This has got to stop. I don't want to have a serious health condition because I have no self control or self discipline. I don't want to end up being too fat to fucking move. I'll be damned if I'm going to let this go on any longer. Here's what is going to happen. I'm going to get off of my fat, lazy ass and strap those sneakers on and get moving. No more fast food. No more soda. No more anything that will cause me to take two steps back. I've been doing okay the last month, BUT as soon as I start doing good, I feel deprived and I give up. THIS WILL NOT BE A DIET! I am changing the way I think, the way I act, the way I eat, etc. I am turning my life around NOW! I don't want to be 225 lbs. I don't want to wake up and look in the mirror and feel like a fat, ugly whale. I want to feel pretty. I want to feel healthy. I'm tired of feeling lazy. I know it isn't going to happen over night, but I CANNOT give up. I REFUSE!!!!!!

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